Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
MIDGETS
????
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
