So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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