Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
