scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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