my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
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