Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
