I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
