There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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