I want to have your abortion
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize
