I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize