the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
She tied me up with her honor cords...
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I need a beard to bite.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
