JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
