normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
