East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Randomize
