Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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