But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize