You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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