That's when you crack a 10am beer
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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