we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Randomize
