If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
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