he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
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