The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
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Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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