Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I am available for nakedness
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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