was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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