Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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