I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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