I got chris browned last night
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
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