Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
