I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
