just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize