Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
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I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
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I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest