Texts From Last Night

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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.

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  (603): you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics. http://tfl.nu/re5j
  Replies (21) Good night (8312) Bad night (807)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid

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  (314): I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid http://tfl.nu/zczt
  Replies (35) Good night (1698) Bad night (3301)
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  (315): View more from New York

  well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her

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  (315): well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her http://tfl.nu/gcpo
  Replies (12) Good night (1318) Bad night (4287)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times

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  (240): oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times http://tfl.nu/z2iz
  Replies (12) Good night (6609) Bad night (1070)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.

  (1-215): View more from Pennsylvania

  and then ....

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.

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  (215): he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas. (1-215): and then .... (215): he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut. http://tfl.nu/qu6h
  Replies (24) Good night (6169) Bad night (1739)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.

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  (850): My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer. http://tfl.nu/izky
  Replies (10) Good night (662) Bad night (1317)
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.

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  (906): I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night. http://tfl.nu/lw8f
  Replies (3) Good night (1198) Bad night (628)
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  (805): View more from California

  I want "hickeys on my ass" sex

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  (805): I want "hickeys on my ass" sex http://tfl.nu/gaw7
  Replies (11) Good night (1905) Bad night (647)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.

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  (603): I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin. http://tfl.nu/m6dy
  Replies (3) Good night (978) Bad night (424)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31

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  (949): July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31 http://tfl.nu/jg6w
  Replies (9) Good night (2186) Bad night (517)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?

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  (610): I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason? http://tfl.nu/yqy8
  Replies (7) Good night (832) Bad night (1079)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  And then someone hit me with a pool cue

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  (604): I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud. (604): And then someone hit me with a pool cue http://tfl.nu/5hgm
  Replies (4) Good night (1108) Bad night (454)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Let's celebrate that I used a condom

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  (425): Let's celebrate that I used a condom http://tfl.nu/rejy
  Replies (2) Good night (456) Bad night (653)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.

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  (317): Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed. http://tfl.nu/4ogn
  Replies (0) Good night (571) Bad night (165)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse

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  (585): You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse http://tfl.nu/9hbn
  Replies (0) Good night (415) Bad night (207)

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