I cockslap morals
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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