And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
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