HIV tests are more positive than that guy
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
NoShamevember. You game?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
