The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
