what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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