i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize