god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
