Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
