Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
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