Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
