my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize
