you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I have feelings that need drinking.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
