i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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