So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
