I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize