Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Randomize
