my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
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