Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Randomize
