i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Small penises have feelings too.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
